w/ love... Dayna

Reverb 2001. Day 4. Healing

2011-12-04T16:38:00.000-08:00

What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2012?

Solitude.

As much as I want to say that my family and friends healed me, it was seriously the time I spent alone that really made me heal. I didn't begin to crave my solitude until I moved out and away from home.

Going through so many things as a young adult made me wonder about the choices that I made. Being alone and being able to reflect on my choices and subsequently learn from them made me take my choices as lessons and not as mistakes.

I saw Eat, Pray, Love for the first time this year and I loved it. It really made me think about the time I spent by myself and how nice it was to be able to begin to find myself on a deeper level.

I would love to be able to continue the journey of discovering myself in 2012.

Reverb 2011. Day 3. Ambition.

2011-12-03T15:47:00.000-08:00

What are your ambitions? What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to/detracts from your ambitions? Can you eliminate it?

As shallow as it seems, my ambition is financial stability. Being a dance therapist would give me not only the ability to go home knowing that I helped people, but I'm also able to support myself and whomever else I choose to. I know how it feels to not be able to help someone because you simply don't have the funds to do so. It's a helpless feeling.

Currently, as stupid as it seems, my university's stupid policies are the forces that detract me from my ambition. If I never get out of college, I'll never be able to reach my goal.

Screw you and your 15 unit cap on classes, Northridge. Grrr.

Reverb 2011. Day 2. Let Go.

2011-12-02T15:33:00.000-08:00

What, or whom, did you let go of this year? Why?

Negativity.

Being around negativity was just mentally exhausting. It gave me a headache, it made me anxious. With negativity came confrontation, and that made my body shake.

Whether it came from myself or from people around me, it was just so tiring. I kept thinking that maybe the people would change, maybe if I just gave them the benefit of the doubt, they would change their ways. And all it did was bring out the worst parts in myself.

So I removed myself from the equation.

I was able to do things better for myself. I slept at night. I didn't worry about people talking about me or having to feel obligated to shit-talk. Then reality crept in. I thought that I had lost some good friends. I wondered who I would spend my time with now that I let them go. But one night; while being on my own and thinking about it, I realized something.

I didn't feel guilty anymore.

That made it so much more worthwhile.

with love,

Dayna

Reverb 2011. Day 1. One Word.

2011-12-01T15:19:00.000-08:00

Day 1- Encapsulate 2011 in one word. Explain why you’re using that word.

Change.

In a span of twelve months, I lived in two different apartments. I went through 7 different roommates and ended up with one. People walked in and out of my life. I met great new people and reconnected with others. I lost friends. I grew, I loved, I laughed, I cried. I got angry, I was hurt, I hurt people.

I celebrated my 20th birthday. I got a new piercing that my parents probably secretly hate. I kissed someone I thought I could love one day. I called someone a stalker. I blocked people from my number and on Facebook.

I deleted people from my life and started trying to stop being around negativity.

I went through a roller coaster of emotions and memories within this year, and with the end of the year approaching quickly, it really made me think how far I've come.

How to make your roommate(s) hate you

2011-11-27T16:37:00.000-08:00

...or at least make them really, really dislike you.

1. Don't clean up after yourself. This includes dishes, the floor, your room and the bathroom. The more messy, the better. Did you cook dinner for yourself and your boyfriend? That's fine, feel free to leave your two plates, two sets of eating utensils and all the pots, pans and cooking utensils in the sink. Don't worry, someone else will clean up after you!

2. Don't pay bills back in a timely fashion. Hey, who really needs $350+ dollars? It's cool, we're all college students. It's not like we need the money to eat or anything.

3. Give everyone in your dorm/apartment undeserving attitude. Even if they didn't do anything to you, be rude to them anyway. Punish them for being your friends just because you're having a bad day. Don't ever apologize.

4. Have your significant other over ALL the time. Don't worry, everyone loves them as much as you do. Bonus points if they sleep over 3 nights in a row and eat a third of the food in the fridge.

5. Be extremely loud during quiet hours. At 2am, we always want to hear you laugh obnoxiously loud to old reruns of Jersey Shore. Or hear you talk about "what you would do if you were ever on the Bad Girls Club". Or have a really big fight with god-knows-who on the phone at all hours of the night, complete with yelling and slamming doors.

woo-sa. Breathe deep.

with love,

Dayna

I've been horrible

2011-11-27T15:16:00.001-08:00

The last post I did was in April. Whoops.

I almost thought of dropping this blog and beginning a new one. Then I realized that if I can't keep up with one blog, how am I supposed to keep up with two?

This is a pre-New Year's resolution; to start/keep writing. I need to start doing things for me, and writing is one of them.

So stay posted, I have about 10 different posts that I'm working on. Be patient. :)

with love,

Dayna

Day 3- Favorite Show

2011-04-21T03:00:00.000-07:00

This is a lighthearted picture of the cast from Criminal Minds. I couldn't deny using this picture (even though it doesn't have Garcia in it, and she's my favorite). It has become my new favorite show.

It appeals to the psychology minor in me. It's so interesting. Although it can be borderline creepy at times, I can't stop watching it!

with love,

D

Day 2- Person you've been closest with the longest

2011-04-20T02:26:00.000-07:00

Friends since 2001.

She's become less of a friend and more of my sister. I love her to death.

with love,

D

Day 1- A picture of you and 15 facts

2011-04-19T00:30:00.000-07:00

I live to dance
I may be small, but I have a lot to give.
I can speak 3 languages.
Bonafide sneaker feen.
I hate jealousy and people's shit-talking, because usually there is no substance behind it.
I like to write.
Even though I get really paranoid afterwards and can't sleep, I love scary movies.
I'm sometime too honest.
I hate to waste time.
I like to think I'm a really good judge of character.
Even if it's really hot, I still have to sleep under a sheet or blanket.
The ASPCA commercial makes me cry.
My hair changes with my mood.
I like Hello Kitty. A lot.
Is a sucker for love.

30 Day Photo Challenge

2011-04-18T22:25:00.001-07:00

Day 01 - A picture of yourself with fifteen facts.
Day 02 - A picture of you and the person you have been close with for the longest.
Day 03 - A picture of the cast from your favorite show.
Day 04 - A picture of your night.
Day 05 - A picture of your favorite memory.
Day 06 - A picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day.
Day 07 - A picture of your most treasured item.
Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh.
Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most.
Day 10 - A picture of the person you do the most messed up things with.
Day 11 - A picture of something you hate.
Day 12 - A picture of something you love.
Day 13 - A picture of someone you trust with your life.
Day 14 - A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without.
Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die.
Day 16 - A picture of someone who inspires you.
Day 17 - A picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently.
Day 18 - A picture of you when you were little.
Day 19 - A picture and a letter.
Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.
Day 21 - A picture of something you wish you could forget.
Day 22 - A picture of your favorite band or artist.
Day 23 - A picture of your favorite book.
Day 24 - A picture of something you wish you could change.
Day 25 - A picture of your day.
Day 26 - A picture of something that means a lot to you.
Day 27 - A picture of yourself and a family member.
Day 28 - A picture of something you're afraid of.
Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.
Day 30 - A picture of someone you miss..
Day 31 - A picture of yourself

Update

2011-04-04T21:05:00.000-07:00

I suck.

I've been paying attention to my school work (as I should), and as a result, blogging has taken a backseat. But now that I've got a handle on things (and school is ending fairly soon) so I have time to write again.

Stay tuned!

w/ love,
D

Valentine's Day- playing for the other team

2011-02-06T20:17:00.000-08:00

In honor of this Valentine's Day or as some people call it "National Single Day", I've made a little list as to why you can still enjoy your singledom on this commercialized couples holiday.

1. You can be selfish. You can wake up in the middle of the bed. You can make breakfast for one- and that means dishes for one.

2. You can use the money you'd spend on your significant other on yourself. Buy those shoes you kept seeing in the window display. Go to the store and buy yourself a new outfit for your next girls night out. Buy yourself a spa day and get an extra long massage. Flirt with the hot masseuse- why? Because you're single.

3. You can bypass that pre-Valentines fighting. Maybe it's just me or the people I've talked to, but it seems like couples tend to argue more frequently right before major holidays. Especially Valentines- it's like the couple is trying to get their last spiteful one-liners in before they have to be all nice and googley-eyed to each other.

4. Remember that many couples break up on Valentines Day. Or the day after, which I think is even worse. At least it's not you.

5. You can go on a date, and not be tied down. That means you can go on a date with 6.5 billion other people. That's 6,500 x 1 million. Uh, yeah.

6. You're the master of the thermostat (or the AC unit) in the car.

7. You can still get laid. Maybe even more often. Certainly with more variety.
8. You can focus on your career. Or school. Or any other non-relationship thing.

What's the best part about being single on Valentine's Day (or any other day) lovelies?

Happy Valentine's Day! Or National Single's Day!

D.

Quick Quote

2011-02-02T09:13:00.000-08:00

Now, I'm not super religious, but I'd be lying if I said that this didn't speak to me.

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference."

Amazing.

Brooklyn

2011-01-30T20:43:00.002-08:00

Two quotes sparked this post, one being the Absolut Brooklyn commercial (got to love my vodka) "Brooklyn. If you're not in it, then you're just in the way."

The second one came from a friend of mines blog, he writes a blog called Tastes like Gold. Here's said quote: "Upon my return, I saw everything in a different light. The streets weren't so dirty, the people weren't so ghetto, and the economy wasn't that bad. I was home, none of that extra stuff mattered."

And it's true, it's so true. There was a time that I became so homesick that when I finally came back home, I didn't care that it was raining when I got off the plane. I didn't care that there were the same 4 guys standing in front of my neighborhood bodega trying to sell people the same thing; cigarettes, weed, (probably stolen) car tires and a "good time" with their "homegirl" (in that order). I didn't care that there was still graffiti everywhere and guys were still trying to get my number from their friends ride.

I ate from my favorite Chinese restaurant, Cheung Lee; a tiny take-out place that has been there and owned by the same man for as long as I could remember, about 3 times a week. My heart swelled when I phoned in my order for pick up and Lee's daughter recognized my voice. Encouraged to be the one to pick up my food, Lee and I had a quick conversation about school and work and I promised to stop by again once I was ready to leave.

I was even glad to spend time with my dad. Like I said, it was some serious homesickness, let me tell you.

I love my hometown dearly.

It cradled me from when I was small and gave me the push I needed to do big things and make huge choices in my life. It exposed me to the horrors of mankind and the cruelty of humanity. It forced me to be strong and be independent. And it always welcomed me back with open arms, no matter how many times I left.

But as much as it's changing as a neighborhood, the people never changed. I still passed the house of my now ex-best friend everyday like I used to; but while I'm going to school and working, she's still out around the neighborhood doing who-knows-what with God-knows-who like we're back in high school. The same people work at the little bodega across the street and the laundry-mat around the corner. I see the same people walking home from the subway after work every night. It was comforting to know that even though I had moved 3000+ miles away from home, I can always come back and feel the same way I did before I left.

Nothing in the world does it for me like Brooklyn does. Travel is so much easier, no waiting around in traffic at all hours of the day. The people are more "real"- to the point where it's almost a fault. They aren't afraid to tell you that you stepped on their foot or that they love your sneakers. Our culture here is so strong, it's almost like a new race. the way we talk, the food, the parades...everything. And you always have to remember your roots- because without them, where would you be today?

But the West Coast still calls. It's a strong pulling relationship between the two, and right now, the West is winning.

with love,

D

Procrastination

2011-01-26T12:52:00.000-08:00

This was a post I wrote Friday night. And got around to posting today. Because I'm a true procrastinator.

I, like many others, am a chronic procrastinator. Why I still continue to do it, I have no idea. Yes, I do good work and it comes out really well and its well put together even though I came up with the idea the night before. But during those hours of work, I honestly have no idea how I get anything done. I'm moody and scrambled and I snap very quickly if I get disturbed. I don't even want to eat, I'm so into my work. And then when it's done, I feel like I'm crashing.

So in the midst of me typing this, I still need to finish packing, clean my room, write two thank you cards, do my last minute laundry, go sneaker shopping with my brother, pack my carry-on and call my manager. It's 3:30 in the afternoon.

Mind you, I have a flight back to LA tomorrow morning and I have to leave my house at 5:30am. Actually, 2 flights (damn layovers)

And I'm not even home. Instead of being home and doing these things, I'm sitting on a train getting ready to take my mom to a motorcycle show. So that means that I wont get home until sometime after the sun is down. Then I get to go home and scramble everything together.

Why do we put ourselves through that stress? Why do we love to get to that point where we want to either hang ourselves to pull our hair out?

Is it the feeling of adrenaline we get when we realize that it's crunch time? Is our work really better; or does it just seem that way because we rushed to get it done?

A New "Friend"- Part 2

2011-01-22T12:05:00.000-08:00

This is Part 2 to the story of T and I. Link to the previous post about him is in the following text:

After my night at the Spring Formal (doesn’t that sound so high school?), I was now 3000+ miles away from Los Angeles, the place that I called my new home. Staying in New York with my parents again was really weird at first and annoying at times, but it was cool.

Five days into my summer break; I was just hanging out at home with my family and my dog, when I got a text.

From him. T and I hadn't spoken since our formal event and we ended our contact with a 3 text conversation of him celebrating my safe arrival back home.

This text (see left) ironically blossomed into a really good conversation; it was actually really random. It was basically the question game- but a lot “classier”. There was no “are you a virgin?” questions, no “do you give head?” questions; it was light and simple. It all began with "Do you like sushi?".

I had never bothered to tell my parents or friends about him- there was no need to, and I definitely wasn't about to start now. When they asked me who I was always texting, I always told them "It's just a friend." They never pushed it, but that didn't stop my dad from teasing me about not having a boyfriend.

Throughout the summer, we stayed in touch sporadically. He was working crazy hours, and I was in school. Because apparently we have no lives. Many of our conversations probably started because we were bored- waiting in line, stuck in traffic, waiting for our deli; some arbitrary reason to pull out our phones and text "someone". Some of our conversations turned sexual, but I guess for the most part we tried to stay away from it. But it never really worked, we always had something to say about the topic- and trust me, it went on for hours. I felt comfortable enough to talk to him and tell him things that I would normally save for a boyfriend or close friend. Our conversations hit every spectrum. But we didn't discuss our sexual pasts; it wasn't necessary. We weren't trying to date each other, but our texts definitely got flirtatious.

He became such a friend that I found myself missing him at times. Even though we only spent time together twice, this guy I met through a mutual friend manage to wiggle his way into the soft spot of my heart. But I could never tell him. Something about saying "I miss you" to him felt as if I was giving him some sort of power over me. I felt like by telling him something like that would make him think I was trying to take it to the next level.

So I didn't. I don't know what about him made me treat him differently than my other friends; maybe it was the fact that he was older and consequently "more experienced", maybe it was the fact that he was so damn sexy to me and I wanted to jump his bones every time we talked on the phone. Or maybe it was the fact that he was so emotionally unavailable to me. He had made it perfectly clear that he didn't want a relationship, and I didn't push the issue. Whatever it was, I couldn't tell him I missed him.

So I kept my mouth shut.

I think the major reason why I wanted him so badly was because of that kiss that never happened. It drove me crazy that he didn't kiss me that night. And as humans, I know we crave certainty and structure. We want to be able to wake up in the morning and know a vast majority of what is going to happen that day.

But at that time, this human wanted the unknown. I craved the unknown. Because this girl's over-active, hormone driven mind and imagination couldn't stop thinking about how good he looked in a suit. Or how delicious he smelled. I was almost itching to know what it felt like to kiss him. I wanted to know if his lips felt at full as they looked. I wondered what type of kisser he was; if he would hold my face or my hips as he kissed me. I wondered if his eyes would cloud over or glaze over like mine after a heavy make-out session and how he would react if I grabbed his lower lip. I wondered if he would hold my hand afterwards.

I spent many a random night thinking about it (and him). But I would never tell him; because that would be weird. And a little creepy.

I think when it all comes down to it, deep down, I felt like things weren't over between us. Not in the sense that I thought we'd date, but something, whatever it was, whatever we had- just wasn't finished yet.

August came and I went back to LA. I started this blog, after transferring from Tumblr and got my life and second semester together. Two days after I touched down, I sent him a text. Conversation ensued and then 2 days later, I got a text from him.

"We making out tonight?"

My heart jumped.

-D.

[yes, there is a cliff hanger. It was originally meant to be longer; but I'm not finished yet, and I want it to be written well. I have no idea what's up with my funky spacing. It looks right when I compose it and then it changes when it's posted. Whatever.]

Make Up Tutorial: Casual Eye

2011-01-21T08:49:00.001-08:00

Someone that read my blog asked me to do a mini-tutorial on how I apply my eye make-up. This was in response to this post, which stated how I can't pull off kohl liner on both the top and bottom parts of my eye.

P.S- Can I just say how warm and fuzzy I feel to be asked to do this? It's my first time, so hopefully everyone can get a little something out of this. And it makes sense LOL.

Now. On to the makeup.

For starters, this takes about 2 minutes to do, once you get it down. I usually do this when I'm going to school or going out somewhere casual, because it makes it look like I actually care about what my face looks like. You can add and do more to up the glam-factor; which is what I do when I'm going to dinner or out partying.

For this look, I use Sephora's eye pencil in white, E.L.F. Professional Smudge Eye Sponge, Sephora Colorful Mono eyeshadow in Mat No. 9, Revlon Colorstay Eyeliner stick in black and L'Oreal Voluminous mascara (see photo for what each product looks like). The white eye pencil can be interchangeable with any color you want, I just chose white because it makes my eyes look fuller and more awake. And as a college student, I need to look awake, even if I don't feel awake (it's about the optical illusions)

This is a similar technique to how you would do a smoky eye, but instead of doing that, I'm just applying it in line. I do this instead of kohl because I still get the color using eyeshadow, but it's a softer application and it doesn't make my eyes look smaller.

The process:

First, I sharpen the white eyeliner and carefully draw a thin line across the lid of my eye (as close to the lashes as you can). I always start out thin because I can always add more later.
Then, using the smudge sponge, I apply the black eyeshadow in a line going from the middle of the lid towards the outer corner. I use the sponge as opposed to the brush because the tip allows for better coverage and more control.
Apply the Revlon eyeliner to the bottom part of my eye.
I end with mascara- you can use a eyelash curler if you want, but I think it looks like a torture device to me, so I don't use it. Besides, my lashes are pretty full and curly to begin with, the mascara just accentuates it.

I think that's it! Hopefully this helps some and let me know if you have any other questions! When I get my new camera, I'll be posting a picture of the finished product, so you can see what I mean. Have fun loves!

with love,

D.

Boys, buy a fruit basket.

2011-01-17T18:33:00.000-08:00

A really close friend of mine (who is gay) left Chris Crocker's video, "Girls Love Their Gays" on my wall and I just had to share. Despite not really being a Chris Crocker fan (and not really keeping up with his shenanigans), somethings he said just had me nodding in agreement. While also being utterly hysterical, the subject matter actually was really quite relevant to my life.

I've known quite a few guys who've tried to get with me in the past, and in between sentences about their favorite sport, most embarrassing moment, and their GPA, the subject matter of gay people always seem to come up. Now some have openly said some pretty awful things about homosexuals, which is a huge turn-off for me. That's usually the time in the conversation that I let them know that some of my closest friends are gay- much to their embarrassment.

Seriously, if you want to date me, don't be rude to my friends.

How do you feel about that lovelies? Have you ever had a moment like that while dating someone?

with love,
D.

Lookbook: Combat Boots

2011-01-14T14:26:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the East Coast's late cold front that gave us this horrible cold weather and forced our sneakers, sandals and flats to the back of our closet, it's time to bust out the boots. Going around the city, I've not only seen a number of those rubber ducky boots, but combat boots as well.

I had always loved seeing women pair their boots with flowery dresses; but I knew that I would never be able to rock that look (well I would, but it's not exactly my style anyway). And I wasn't sure about how they would look on me, so I never bought them for myself.

My mom (aka Momma Dearest) however, went ahead and bought me some tall combat boots for Christmas. After opening them and putting them on, I was unsure how I would dress them up and make them my own style. I mean, how do you wear combat boots when your style changes like the weather? Despite this, I took the challenge with open arms.

A couple days ago, I came out my snow-induced hibernation and went to the post office to get a money order to pay my rent (oh, the lovely adult-like responsibilities I have) and so I needed a quick outfit to wear to run this errand. I actually pulled out jeans and my rain boots for this event; for some reason, the temperatures have been rising so NYC is filled with a bunch of huge puddles and slushy snow to trek through on our way to the subway. Way to try to ruin my shoes Mother Nature.

So it was about 40 degrees (funny how 40 degrees is now "warmer" weather) so it was warm enough to get away with tights and socks. Together with a pair of shorts (which I rarely do here, but I picked it up in LA. So sue me.) and tied together with my brand new combat boots, I was ready to go.

Despite a couple people asking me if I was cold (which I wasn't- and it really only included creepy guys trying to ask for my number) the outfit went over pretty successfully. I actually liked the outfit better with the jacket closed- partially because I couldn't be bothered to put on a cute shirt.

You can see the designs on the tight a lot better in the smaller pictures along with the textures of the shorts.

P.S.- don't mind the full body shot with the wacky lighting. It was taken in my kitchen by my dad, who definitely isn't accustomed to my digital camera. It looks a lot better when it's smaller. It was just used to show the full outfit. Below is a list of where to get the clothes.

Jacket- Charlotte Russe
Scarf- taken from my mother
Shorts- Forever XXI
Tights- H&M (I think) or Charlotte Russe
Socks- American Apparel
Combat Boots- Soda (that's the brand in the shoe)

with love,
Dayna

Follow Me!

2011-01-08T12:46:00.000-08:00

Since I spend a lot of time reading blogs, I figured it would be a good thing to give BlogLovin' a try.

Just in case you don't know what it is, I've put a video below that explains what it is better than I can.

Follow my blog with bloglovin

w/ <3,

Things I can't get away with in the name of fashion

2011-01-04T12:05:00.000-08:00

These aren't things I just realized I couldn't do; it came from many years (or months) trying to figure out different ways to rock the look. Sometimes it worked, but most of the time it didn't- it just came to the point where I stopped trying to do it.

1. The oh-so-sexy "just rolled out of bed", messy hair look. Maybe it's because I'm a girl with a relaxer, or maybe it's because I flip and roll over in bed twelve hundred times a night. Either way, I look a hot mess in the morning. Or at least my hair does.

2. High waisted pants. I'm a short girl with a short torso. And while I'm of an athletic build, I'm no where near the perfectly flat stomach I used to have when I was 12. No matter if they're shorts, skinnies, or trousers; they just don't work for me.

3. Black eyeliner on both the upper and lower parts of my eye. I tried it, and I looked evil. Straight gothic. My eyes are a deep, dark brown and without makeup they're dark enough already (albeit small, but that's for another post) so no full-rimmed black liner for me!

4. Ballet flats and skinny jeans. I'm a size 7.5- 8 in my shoes, and with the skinny ankles I inherited from my mother; paired with skinny jeans, my average size feet become long, size 10 or 11 looking feet.

5. Puffy winter jackets. I'm 5'3'' with a short torso- do I need to explain further? Besides, every time I sit down, I look like the Michelin man with all his rolls. The same goes with long, ankle length puffer coats. Too many bulges for me.

What fashion trends can you not get away with?

with love,

Dayna

Eyes Lips Face False Eyelashes- "Falsies"

2011-01-01T12:00:00.000-08:00

As a dancer; whether it's for pictures, partying with my friends or performing, false eyelashes have become a part of my beauty arsenal. And even though they aren't the simplest things to put on, they add the glam and the extra "ooophm" to your make-up.

Easily, one of the best sets I've come across were the false lashes from one of my go-to places for performance makeup and nail polish, Eyes Lips Face. Their makeup is, um, inexpensive (as my mother says- "we never say our things are cheap") as many of their products are only a dollar each. Any college student can agree, that's about as budget friendly as you can get without the products actually being free!

Now, I understand that you get what you pay for; but I've used a fair share of their products and while they don't last as long as other brands, most of them are pretty high quality for the price. I use the words "high quality" sparingly. I'm not trying to say that, for example, Eyes Lips Face (also called e.l.f.) nail polish is just as good as OPI nail polish. I have both, I use both and I know first hand which one is longer-lasting and therefore, better.

But, for the things that you don't usually use everyday- like false eyelashes- e.l.f. is the way to go. So since I don't use false eyelashes that often, I felt better buying them knowing they'd be put to good use when I needed it.

When I wore them for the photo shoots, the lashes looked full, without looking super fake. They also came out very natural looking, which is what we were going for. We wanted my eyes to look full, without looking like I was a porn star. I didn't even have to take them off after the shoot, even with every day makeup, they looked great.

The only downside to the lashes were the glue included in the package. The first time I used it, the bottle was so small and hard to open because you had to poke a hole in the top. After poking the hole, the glue basically shot out of the bottle and landed all over my fingertips. Not fun to remove. The second time, after successfully poking the hole in the the top and applying it to the lashes, they took forever to become tacky and they didn't feel all that secure. I could feel the corners lifting when I applied mascara.

I would suggest you use your own glue (I use DUO lash adhesive- found in Sephora for $8) when applying the lashes. The only problem that I've had with DUO was that the spout where the glue comes out of is huge. If you sneeze while holding that bad boy, it's over- glue everywhere! But it does dry clear and it stays on for a very long time. It also comes in black so that it looks like you have liner on when you apply the lashes.

So if you choose to use falsies, I'd suggest e.l.f. lashes for your first time. Quick, easy and they look super amazing when applied right. :)

What kind of falsies do you use lovelies? Are they expensive? Are the prices worth it?

MMXI

2010-12-31T23:55:00.000-08:00

With 2010 coming to a close, people are freaking out about making New Year's resolutions. I personally don't make set-in-stone New Year's resolutions, because I don't think we should set a certain date to choose to do do better things with our lives.

So my New Year's resolution is to not make New Year's resolutions.

When I was younger (and probably a lot more ambitious towards this sort of thing), my list was usually "I want to get toned, I want to get all straight A's, I want to exercise everyday and eat healthier, I want to be better as a person... the list goes on and on. Many a time, I would end up doing whatever my "resolution" was for about a month, and then I was over it.

Top left and bottom right are mine. The other two are not.

So this year, I'm just living and doing what's right. I know what's good for me. I know what food is healthy, and what's not. I know who to involve myself with and who to avoid. I know that partying all night every weekend and leaving my 12 page paper for the last week won't help my grades. I know choices that I can make for myself that will affect people around me in either a positive or negative way. I don't need a list of resolutions to tell me that.

I know I won't be able to do it all on my own; but experience, love from family and friends and God will help me through it all.

Cheers to a new year. It's another chance to make it right and make it count.

with love,

Dayna

These boots are made for walking...

2010-12-29T15:04:00.000-08:00

...and a full day of class.

[I really need to start posting these posts on time. This past semester, I've had horrible time management skills. Sorry!]

With less than 6 days from Thanksgiving, we've been having really funky weather lately. Last week I had a scarf and jacket on, and today I have shorts on. I guess it's a weird West Coast thing to get used to again, because back home it's already in the 50's and 40's!

I recently got these boots at Charlotte Russe, which has become my go-to place for clothes in Northridge. I'm not a huge fan of "fast fashion" but on a college student budget, our shopping options are kind of limited. Plus, it's comfortable, easy to wear, and flattering on most. The clothes don't shrink or fray as soon as you put them in the washing machine. They also have a really good return policy which included frays found after purchase (at least in my experience). Our mall isn't as great as New York shopping but it has some pretty good stores to choose from.

Anyway, on to the shoes. These are actually a size 9, but the shoes from Charlotte Russe run a little small so I went a size up (and they were the last boot in the store- no judgment). They are flat, but not so flat that I feel even shorter for wearing them (they have a 1" heel or so) and not so flat that I feel like my feet are pounding the concrete.

The boots are super comfy and are tall so it can work for fall or colder climates (which will be posted soon). They also fold up higher to cover your knees, which makes your outfits more versatile. I wore these babies to campus- where I had a full 8am to 3pm schedule. And despite the walk to campus, walking across campus multiple times to get to class and the walk back home, my feet didn't hurt.

This is something that I usually wear on my school days. It's something quick, simple and comfortable for the 3 hour lectures and something I grabbed at 7am. I call it "campus fashion", an outfit that is definitely school friendly.

Here's the Polyvore LookBook version in case you want to know where the clothes came from. I can't guarantee that they will all still be there, but you'll be able to find similar things. Also, the knit thigh high stockings are also from Charlotte Russe, but I wasn't able to find a picture. The same goes for the boots. I posted similar ones on the Polyvore image (I have those too, ironically).

And because I'm lazy and working on new posts, I realized that I made a LookBook for winter wear (when the weather is not ball-shrinking cold) that was similar. And I mean extremely similar- same shirt and everything. There was just an addition to the outfit with a scarf I thrifted and a Charlotte Russe jacket that I can't find the image for. Don't mind the makeup-less face, I was running errands and our street was finally cleared.

What does your school/comfort fashion look like?

with love,

Dayna

Rings and things.

2010-12-06T12:05:00.000-08:00

I love rings. Love, love, love rings. They are simple, but they add so much style and personality to any outfit. My favorite accessory trend right is the two-finger ring. They can dress up any outfit, and they add the right amount of hardware when you want it. I also love the fact that you can just wear those and not have to wear more arm jewelry, like bracelets and bangles.

I have a couple of these, but my absolute favorite is the boom box ring from GirlProps. It's one of those things you own that whenever you wear it, it always gets a compliment or a question. It also helps that it's adjustable, for those girls who have wide knuckles (like me).

The only problem is that some of the rings, while super cute, are kind of cheap and change color along the fingers. Which turns your fingers green, which is never cute. So make sure you paint some clear nail polish to prevent that color change!

This is also my first time using Polyvore, which I think is so much fun! It's so much easier than going out and taking my own lookbook pictures, even though I'll take some during break. It makes me so happy to make these outfits and putting accessories together.

{dance} Change is happening.

2010-12-04T17:20:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer: This is not a personal attack on anyone. This is purely meant to be an expressive outlet of mine. It's better to write about it than say it. At least then I can delete if it comes out wrong.

Besides, if you take personal offense to anything in this post, you probably did something to feel guilty about. Enjoy.

There's been a lot happening during the past couple months in terms of the dance team I'm on.

Was on. Gosh, that feels so... weird. I don't mean it in a bad way, but it's kind of nice to be able to close a chapter in my life.

In the beginning, it had many highs. I was young, I was fresh, and I had no idea what to expect from a team in a town I had never heard of until I moved. I took whatever they threw at me in stride and kept my mouth shut. I held my tongue a lot during that time. I made tentative friends and I turned 18 that semester.

My second semester, I began to feel more comfortable. I had been in LA for about 5 months by then and I finally knew and felt somewhat comfortable in my surroundings. I had a solid group of friends and I was making progress with my dancing. I became known as the "cool" one. I had my two really good friends and we were together constantly. Our weekends were always spent together and we had tons of inside jokes. I considered them almost like my sisters. I did anything for them, and I was glad to do it.

Then the summer happened.

By my third technical semester, I was beginning to be over the team. Some people who started off shy and humble suddenly got this huge boost of confidence. They took that confidence and treated people like shit. Why? Because they could. People were content to just talk shit and hate on each other.

A lot of their weekends were spent either drinking and hooking up with each other, and someone would always have to play baby-sitter. People's resources got taken advantage of and people stopped listening to each other. And instead of talking about it, some were content with just writing "indirect" complaints and mean words about others and posting it on public sites like Facebook. Or they would sit behind closed doors and shit talk.

Now I'm not saying that I'm an angel. But where I differed from those people was the fact that I talked to them about it. If I had a complaint about it, I brought it up to them and let them know. They took it however they wanted- but mostly in a negative light.

That wasn't something I was ok with and I began to shut down. I allowed myself to become so disconnected from the team that even being horribly sick for 5 days was almost a god-send for me. I didn't want to practice and hang around the team members. As a result, people began to spread this horrible seed about how much I hated the team and how much of a horrible person I was. They took my disciplined past and labeled it as being bitchy. They took my questioning for being rude and ungrateful. Being a director became a burden for me. I wasn't happy. One of the girls I was really close with ended up being the seed of the rumors and our friendship hit the fan. People blamed me, because she was "too nice to be wrong"

I took it. And I stayed silent. I knew I had my faults, but I knew I wasn't that bad. I knew in my heart I wasn't the dramatic, cold-hearted diva some thought of me to be. I knew how much work; blood, sweat and tears, that I gave for the team. I knew the pain I felt when I performed 2 competitions with shin splints; and even though I had to get carried out once I hit the wings, I never complained. Ever. I sucked it up and did my thing to make the team happy.

Some took the silence as anger. And I let them. I stopped caring. I let them believe that I didn't care about the team. I let them believe that the times I had to yell at people " to stop fucking around because we are in a cold parking structure after midnight on a school night" was because I didn't care about them. But I kept a smile on my face and laughed when it was appropriate. Only a few saw the struggle.

Fast forwarding to December 3rd of this year. We had our banquet, which was my final banquet as a member. It was interesting to say the least. But all in all, I walked away with awards that made me feel good. I was "Top Model", which surprised me because modeling is definitely not my forte.

But a couple things took me by surprise. 1. I won a new award; based off the militaristic Medal of Honor for my distinguished excellence. 2. I got letters (see left-similar to the fraternity letters) even though no one was supposed to. 3. My secret buddy's gift was totally awesome and I'm super excited for it.

But finally, I realized I didn't cry. Don't get me wrong, I teared up, but not enough to constitute as tears. I didn't shed a tear at that event; it wasn't until I got home that I let any tears loose.

And it wasn't because I was grateful for everything. That wasn't it at all. It was because that, in the end- the final day with that team- I still would have never really been recognized for the hard work and heart I gave the team. The person who gave me the awards, and medals, and letters was an advisor. He wasn't the main director. He wasn't one of my dance peers. He didn't even dance anymore. But he saw my hard work, my dedication and my heart and he thanked me for it.

And that's good enough for me. The letters, I cherish for myself. I know what I did and I don't have anything to prove to anyone. Especially not my self-worth.

I'm not leaving bitter. If I was, this would of never been written. But once it's down on paper (or on the blog) it's out of my head. It's done.

So thank you. Thanks for the memories. Like I told someone last night, I'm not dwelling on things that happened during the last 3 semesters and using it as a template on how to live my life and how my friendships should be.

It's time to make new memories.

with love,

Dayna

If school wan't kicking my ass right now...

2010-11-05T20:58:00.000-07:00

I'd totally be writing everyday. Unfortunately, until around 2013-2014, that wouldn't happen. But, I'm still writing, just not posting as much as I should.

Sorry.

w/ love,

D

I whip my hair...

2010-10-19T19:53:00.000-07:00

All I can say is Willow Smith better work that shit. I really hope she doesn't end up being another one of those crazy child stars 15 years from now.

This was bomb. Point blank period.

w/ love,

Dayna

My Own Apartment

2010-10-11T00:30:00.000-07:00

[This is a post I started about last year when I was living at my old place. I'm no where as bitter now LOL. Although I still have some qualms about living with people, I've become more tolerant with the idea and have learned to actually enjoy the experience.]

...

After living with my parents for 17 years, I really couldn’t wait to move out; maybe have a cool roommate or two and live in an apartment. But after living with total strangers for 10 months who ended up not being the fabulous roommates I had wanted, I decided that what I really want is my own place.

Yes, my own place. Where the bills only come in my name. Where I am the only one who has a key.

I don’t want to be sitting on the couch flipping through the channels, worrying about how I’m going to pay my cable bill; because my roommate just had to have every HBO, Starz and Cinemax channel available, and now I, the non-HBO watching, movie downloading roommate, has to scrounge up money to cover my part. I don’t want to have to ask my mom and brother for money to buy groceries anymore. I don’t want to have to yell at my roommate for leaving the oven on again especially since there are no more cookies in there baking.

I want to be able to walk into my apartment to the sound of silence (or the lovely jingling of a doggy collar), kick off my shoes, put my keys on the counter and flip through my mail. I want to sit and watch my TV and cook food that I brought for myself. I want to be stingy with my music, and be able to play it as loud as I want. I want to be able to walk around my apartment buck ass naked if I wanted, and no one is there to witness it.

I don’t want to walk in my door and see a live-in boyfriend (who is not my own) sit on the couch, stuffing his face with the food that I just bought and resting his dirty sneakers on the coffee table that I just cleaned hours ago, and making the apartment smell like weed. Ever, ever again. I never want to have to lie about secretly wanting to gouge his eyes out with a Sharpie every time he calls and asks me where his girlfriend is. And I don’t want to be the awkward party in the room having to listen to their sloppy, slurping-sounding face sucking techniques, while I’m trying to watch So You Think You Can Dance in peace.

I don’t want to have to walk into my living room and politely tell my roommates-again- that I have to be up 6:30am to get ready for my Biology lab, and I already stayed up until 3am making you bitches pancakes and listening to you whine about your random dramas, so would it kill you to not scream like banshees, bang dishes into the dishwasher and blast Vampire Diaries at this god-forsaken hour?

I want to be able to wake up in the morning and not see another female in another bed across from me. I don’t want to have to share a closet anymore. And I definitely don’t want to wait for my turn for the shower after I come in the door all sweaty from doing moderate to heavy activity in the 90 degree heat on top of a damn parking structure.

I just want time to decompress at the end of the day.

-Dayna

P.S.- And I don’t want to have to explain to my mother why I can’t do my laundry because the damn machine is broken because my roommate decided to add water to the thing and consequently flood the patio. But that's another story for another time.

Beliefs

2010-09-27T11:00:00.000-07:00

I’m not a huge fan of the 30 day challenges because after about 5 days, it begins to feel like a homework assignment so I normally stop. But there were a few challenges that I came across that I was interested in.

Like beliefs. Some might say I'm a child of contradictions but:

I believe in God and the Devil.
I believe in the idea of reincarnation and being brought back after death.
I believe in astrology and that the planets affect us.
I believe that love is real.
I believe that world peace could be achieved if everyone was tolerant of each other.
I believe that we as humans can never truly be independent.
I believe in ghosts. I think that you can walk into a room and feel a presence that wasn't there before.
I believe in karma. What goes around comes around and people should remember that.
I believe that happiness is a decision, and nothing more.
I believe in living less by the clock, and more by the time.
I believe in the power of words. Whether it's verbal or even in a text, it's powerful.

But more than anything: I believe in myself.

w/ love,

Dayna

A New "Friend"

2010-09-25T22:52:00.001-07:00

I wrote this a while ago but it seems like the right time to post it now. There's a part 2 to this but there was a 3 month hiatus between this story and the next part.

Part 1- May, 2010

We technically met through a mutual friend. We were basically handed each other’s numbers and then were set loose, however weird and unromantic it sounds. He was to be a date for our team’s end of the year formal. I was strongly against the idea because I didn’t want to be stuck to a person that no one knew and have to spend all my time introducing him to everyone instead of enjoying myself. A week before the event however, a friend of mine showed up to my house with a picture and a smile. My goose was cooked.

Let’s call him T. I was only told his first name and that he was a gentleman.

The first time we talked on the phone, it was awkward to say the least. I was pacing around my room in my pajamas, trying not to make up an excuse to get off the phone. The conversation was punctuated with awkward laughs and "You've never done anything like this, have you?” I found out he was older, considerably older, but it didn't matter. I wasn't trying to date him; he was just a date to our event.

Now, if this was a year or two ago, I would of never agreed to this arrangement. I would have never even picked up the phone. I would have made up some excuse to never talk to him. But I couldn't. I was an adult, or at least that's what I was pretending to be these days. So I sat on the phone and endured the awkwardness.

But I couldn’t lie, he was sexy. Or at least there was something sexy about him that I just couldn’t deny. Or maybe I was just testosterone deprived. He told me to call him later that week so we could discuss plans on what to wear and the ticket sale.

A couple days later, I was doing my last bit of hardcore studying in the library with friends before school ended and so I decided to call him before I went into the depths of hell. He picked up- he was just hanging out at home doing his last bit of free time before he had to start working. Forty minutes later, we were still talking and I was getting no studying done. It definitely wasn't as awkward as before; in fact, there almost wasn't any awkwardness. I finally was comfortable enough to sit and relax into the conversation.

I wasn't worried about the fact that he could be a crazy stalker or murderer. I wasn’t worried about the age difference or the fact that I made a decision to have him as my date based off of a single picture of him. He made me think and I made him laugh. I learned that not only we were both single (obviously), but it was by choice. Awesome. We both agreed that we should meet up before our event so we could at least see each other face to face before we got all formal looking.

Towards the end of the week, we finally met face to face at our resident Farmers Market. It was perfect; there was bound to be loads of people there and we would be able to bring as many people we wanted in order to feel comfortable.

And of course I took a mid-afternoon nap and was consequently late. Oops. I drove over there with a few friends and texted him that I showed up.

I broke away from my friends and met him in front of Woodranch. He had gotten hungry while waiting and was there with a friend. I texted him that I’d wait outside for him. I settled in front and waited patiently. Well, as patiently as I could given the circumstances.

He said he was paying and he'd be out soon with his friend. I tried to keep both my mind and my face calm as my brain tried to decipher who this mysterious "friend" was. It was small, but my brain couldn't stop fabricating pictures of some pretty girl that he must be talking to and having a late lunch/early dinner with.

He finally came out; followed by a man. My mind relaxed again and I was able to crack a smile. Or four. He gave me a really good hug and introduced me to his friend, C. His friend was cute; not as cute as T, but he could get it. We walked off to find my friends again. I didn’t even get my mouth open before I started getting knowing looks and elbow rubs from my friends. A girl passed by with her friends and set a longing look in his direction. Either he didn’t notice or he didn’t care.

Introductions were made and we settled into the crowd for some heavy duty conversation. I won’t say that it was only the two of us, because it would be a lie. I won’t say that the whole world disappeared and it felt like we were the only two in the market, because that would be a lie too. But the conversation was good. He eased my fears about me having to babysit him throughout the night.

If I fell in love with anything that night, it was his eyes. They weren’t green, or hazel, or gray, or any other fancy color; but a dark, piercing brown. His eyes were small and slightly slanted in the corners giving them an Asian appearance. He had the natural light and “glitter” in them, you could tell when he was laughing genuinely, or when he was getting tired. I could read his emotions so easily just by looking at him.

He left later that night because he had work in the morning and he had to take his friend home. We parted with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Sitting in the car on the way home, I was bombarded with questions and comments about him.

“How’d you meet him?”

“He’s so cute!”

“Get it Asian lover!”

“Are you two dating?”

I didn’t answer any of them. I just laughed and changed the subject. Everyone got the picture and didn’t push it.

...

Long story short, our formal was amazing. Drinks were flowing, the music was good, the award ceremony was beautiful and we danced all night. Much to everyone's surprise (including and especially my own), we didn't hook up that night. Not even a good night kiss.

I found myself strangely disappointed. I'm not sure if it was because I expected him to try something, but I didn't expect him to not try something. It was strange.

I texted him later that night to make sure he got home safely. I "indirectly" brought up the absence of the good night kiss and he chalked it up to "just meeting me". He apologized for being old-fashioned, but I was cool with it. We bid each other a good night.

I went back home to NY the next day.

Read Part 2 here

After many complications...

2010-09-06T22:23:00.000-07:00

I'm finally blogging again. I've finally finished the process of moving into my new apartment.

These are in no particular order but it's pretty simple to figure out which came first.

My life in bullets:

Flying in on the 12th of August and moving into a temporary space while my roommates got their finances together.
having no internet access for about 3 weeks
having roommate issues (consisting of her not paying rent on time, me giving her the benefit of the doubt, us waiting, and then me consequently yelling at her and kicking her out of the apartment)
finding a replacement roommate
driving 150 miles in 2 days
partying at Level 3 with Poreotics
moving my own stuff out of storage and into my new place and then moving my friends apartment in less than 24 hours
unpacking and getting school stuff together
paying an obscene amount of money on textbooks that I'll only use for 15 weeks
seeing an "old" friend (and consequently hooking up with him)
partying for the first time at Rage
the Fanny Pak CD release party
30+ hour rehearsal in 5 days and then performing at World of Dance San Diego

Right, and school. That too.

Life has been so crazy and I've been running around and doing things and some of these bullets will have their own personal posts. But until then, I'm off to read my boring Poli Sci textbook.

with love,

D

The final lap of the apartment race

2010-08-02T18:49:00.000-07:00

This is definitely a scary part of starting school in a different apartment than I did last year. I'm in the middle of signing my lease agreement and I'm sending it out tomorrow. Here's me hoping and praying that I get the apartment. If not, I'll have no place to live. And that scares the fuck out of me. And my mother.

I'm crossing my fingers that the manager tells me that I have the apartment. For the sake of my sanity.

I won't even complain about having a roommate. Well, 3 other roommates. I won't complain. Promise.

For now.

Because who knows? Maybe these girls will become some of my closest friends. Maybe I'll open the door and be happy to go inside with a genuine smile on my face and a greeting on my lips.

Maybe I'll end up going to prison for killing them in their sleep. I have no idea what's in store for me. And it hella creeps me out.

-D

Oh Freshman Year...

2010-07-31T08:31:00.000-07:00

Since I moved the blog over to Blogger, the 38 or so posts that I had on Tumblr has no way of getting over to this blog. And until Tumblr figures out a way for PC users to export posts, I have to make due with what I have. And that means talking about the experiences again.

But now in more detail (well, some of them, and for the ones I really remember. Come on, it's been a year!)

Anyway, in a nutshell... I moved 3000 miles, had 2 roommates, had 1 live-in boyfriend (who wasn't mine), hooked up with 7 guys (hooked up meaning kissing, not fucking. Cochinos), met 3 amazing people, went to Vegas, met countless interesting people, met 3 celebrities, smoked weed twice (hated it each time. Blegh, never again), turned legal, went to San Francisco, partied hearty, drank too much, loved too little and learned some valuable lessons in the name of friendship and relationships- and I didn't even date anyone in 2009!

Oh and school. Right, that too. Managed over a 3.0 GPA and kept my scholarship. This girl has brains too :)

All I can say is that moving was one of the most fulfilling and amazing experiences of my life.

Let's go sophomore year, whatcha got for me?

The beginning of it all

2010-07-30T20:20:00.000-07:00

Three years ago, I told my parents that I wanted to go to school in California. Reactions ranged; dad said no, mom laughed and held up a pamphlet for a school in Rome, big brother shrugged and said "I've never gone to LA. Cool." I don't think anyone thought I was actually serious, until senior year of high school rolled around.

Long story short, I (not-so) secretly only applied for California schools and got accepted to most of the ones I wanted. My parents were shocked, not because the didn't think I would get accepted, but because they really didn't think I would get up and move. Also, moving 3000 miles across the country in the midst of California's budget cuts, out-of-state tuition hikes and a growing recession probably couldn't of been one of my brightest ideas.

11 months after senior year started, I sat on a LAX-bound plane to Northridge, California with my big brother. A week later, I was on my own. No close friends, no family... just me and my choices.

Sitting on that flight made me realize that the choices I made in life, no matter how hard, got me to where I am today. When you want something in life, you give it your all. The rewards feel so much better that way.

With that being said, welcome to my little piece of the blog-o-sphere. I hope you enjoy what you read.

D.